Have you come to yourself yet?
Have you been down so far low that you can't see up?
Have you been on the edge with the fear that a gust of
wind will topple you over and you'll crash below

So you just hang on and wait it out

I have and now that I'm back under the shelter of the tree
I'm different, more tolerant, more accepting and less judging

I've come to myself and I think I like the view from here

How Could You

How could you do it?
She's only a little girl
Couldn't you of found someone else
someone your own age

How could you of broken the trust
Are you not supposed to be her protector
One who looks out for her?
Didn't you know how it would effect her

How it would tear away at her
like a thread you pull on a sweater
and the whole thing unravels

How could you cause so much pain
Life is like a tapestry and now hers has been stripped
messing threads to a whole section of her life
A big gaping hole, never to be filled
always there as a reminder

Why

Why make a house of candy if you don't want kids to come?
Why did she have so many children, when she only had one shoe
Why was He up on that wall, did he not know of his frailty?

Why, why must I try
Why must I cry
searching through the past
to find the future

Why must I go
Why because I know
to find the missing link
keeping me from the brink

About Me

I am a over 40 year old woman who has two children and have found it the hardest thing in my life to do! Raise Children!!! I once asked my aunt, "Why didn't anyone tell me it was so hard?" She replied, if we had you wouldn't have done it!! Now don't get me wrong, I love my kids with all my heart, but sometimes you see these celebrities who have a baby and they speak of this light that has come into their lives, their hearts widening, they have now come alive. I wonder if their existence to this point had been so bad? Children did not complete me, I am still incomplete! I am still imperfect and having children in my home emphasizes this daily!!! I volunteer at my kids school, I taxi my teenager around to know she will be safe and not riding in the car with other teens, I strive to protect them from the abuse that I experienced as a child, to keep them safe. I work daily to communicate with them, to find out how they are. I wish and hope for great things in their lives. But I don't feel like they are a great light in my life, hmmm, maybe I am missing something?

WOW!!

Well here I go into the world of blogging. My sister in law and I have been discussing this new phenomenon and wondering why it is called "a blog"? The one thing I just kept saying was, it is a online diary, a journal for all the view....I guess I should come clean now and admit that she was the one who kept insisting on knowing the originality of the actual word "blog" The only thing we could come up with is....people keep logs and maybe it comes from binary log smoouched together to make: blog. How'd we do?

Just a side note, before I went to publish this post, I spelled checked, and you will never guess what happened? The freakin' spellcheck program on this blog does NOT reconize the word BLOG!!!! It asked if I would like to change it to bloc!! Go Figure!!!!!